Online dating
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As a woman of a certain age I think it has become harder and harder to meet people in search of a relationship. How do I go about it?
Nightclubs? Heavens no, I hated those when I was young, now I can’t tolerate them unless it’s a friend’s birthday and I am honour-bound to put up and shut up!
Bars? Here my inability to talk to people I don’t know kicks in. Through mutual friends? I know all my friends’ friends, so unless someone does something radical and meets a new crop then I’m still stuck. Joining a club? I have done that several times but most women my age have partners – Where are all the singles?
This brings me to online dating. Not as sad as it sounds! In fact, many moons ago, when ads like this were still in a GCN which resembled a newspaper, I met my bestest bud through such an ad. So I know there are nice people out there, I know most of them are genuine and just like me, trying to find someone to spend time with.
However, I don’t know about anyone else but sometimes being on a dating site makes me feel crap about myself. Not for the reasons you might think, I don’t think it is in any way pathetic or needy, in fact I think it’s quite empowering.
My issue is that I think I look fat in my picture, I look dull on my profile and looking at other people’s pages makes me feel shallow. Why am I not mailing this person? Because she says she likes nightclubs and I hate them? Come on Gooner, open up that mind of yours a tad more!
I think perhaps the reason I feel wholly unattractive on line is because its difficult to get your personality across in a few lines. Plus, my idea of a great relationship might not be the accepted one. I think Ellen put it best when she said somethig like: I don’t like doing anything so I found someone else who doesn’t like doing anything. Is there anything Ellen doesn’t know?
I am going to stick to going online every few weeks and sending the odd mail, but it’s tough to stay motivated.
Does anyone have any tips on profile writing etc.? I know I’m not the only one out there looking!
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lol@how this is turning...
I set up a plentyoffish about a year ago, and my description says ‘There is no way to fill out one of these without sounding like a dickhead, so I’ll just say it: I’m a dickhead’
And it worked! I got loads of messages, because it turns out that it doesn’t matter what your profile picture looks like [mine was a picture of me in the middle of a human centipede]- you just gotta make ‘em laugh.
Plenty of Fish has a new video on how to set up a profile that’s going to be effective.
(Link to the video here)
May I suggest the best way to get your personality accross is to use an online dating site that allows you to easily add your own video to your profile using the webcam on your computer. This may see a little daunting at first but if you prepare prompts to remind you of the things you want to talk about – your interests and what you looking for in your ideal mate then with some practice it should result in you receiving loads of interest!
Some sites I know that offer this feature are doglover(dot)biz for dog lovers, attracion(dot)com for people looking for their soul mate and thirdagedating(dot)com for mature singles 40 and over.
Good luck!
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I find giving up all hope and taking the “curl up in a ball alone” approach to work every time!
I hear ye Aoife!
Lol im advocating the blow up dolls…haha i joke. As cliche as it sounds you always end up meeting someone when you least expect it and arent looking. Though i get what youre saying in your article too about it getting harder to meet people the older you get because usually its a gay niteclub or maybe college where you meet someone though groups like running amach are great for making new friends and meeting girls etc…i agree with Dolan Chap sense of humour on an online profile is the way to go. Well…its what i would find attractive anyway! If someone can take the piss out of themseleves its always a good thing…though nothing wrong with having some self confidence!
*themselves
[...] Online dating | gaelick – As a woman of a certain age I think it has become harder and harder to meet people in search of a relationship. Bars? Here my inability to talk to people I don’t know kicks in. Through mutual friends? I know all my friends’ friends, so unless someone does something radical and meets a new crop then I’m still stuck. [...]