As a woman of a certain age I think it has become harder and harder to meet people in search of a relationship. How do I go about it?
Nightclubs? Heavens no, I hated those when I was young, now I can’t tolerate them unless it’s a friend’s birthday and I am honour-bound to put up and shut up!
Bars? Here my inability to talk to people I don’t know kicks in. Through mutual friends? I know all my friends’ friends, so unless someone does something radical and meets a new crop then I’m still stuck. Joining a club? I have done that several times but most women my age have partners – Where are all the singles?
This brings me to online dating. Not as sad as it sounds! In fact, many moons ago, when ads like this were still in a GCN which resembled a newspaper, I met my bestest bud through such an ad. So I know there are nice people out there, I know most of them are genuine and just like me, trying to find someone to spend time with.
However, I don’t know about anyone else but sometimes being on a dating site makes me feel crap about myself. Not for the reasons you might think, I don’t think it is in any way pathetic or needy, in fact I think it’s quite empowering.
My issue is that I think I look fat in my picture, I look dull on my profile and looking at other people’s pages makes me feel shallow. Why am I not mailing this person? Because she says she likes nightclubs and I hate them? Come on Gooner, open up that mind of yours a tad more!
I think perhaps the reason I feel wholly unattractive on line is because its difficult to get your personality across in a few lines. Plus, my idea of a great relationship might not be the accepted one. I think Ellen put it best when she said somethig like: I don’t like doing anything so I found someone else who doesn’t like doing anything. Is there anything Ellen doesn’t know?
I am going to stick to going online every few weeks and sending the odd mail, but it’s tough to stay motivated.
Does anyone have any tips on profile writing etc.? I know I’m not the only one out there looking!