Kris talks the talk about talking the talk
Walking into a college lecture, uncharacteristically early, the following sentence awoke me from my mid-afternoon slump.
“Here. She’s the one I’m currently fucking.”
I looked across the room to see a girl with cropped auburn hair, proudly displaying her iPhone to two, what appeared to be, male first years.
“She’s hot,” one dutifully replied, while the other stared intensely at the image on the screen.
“She’s nice tits hasn’t she?” the girl said proudly.
Just then her iPhone beeped, causing her to swipe her mobile off the transfixed teenager.
“Aaaah. She’s like, totally getting into the shower right now. Talk about giving me a major HORN. She is so going down on me later.”
Yep, CRINGE. That was the overwhelming feeling that I felt for that girl in question, who I’m sure thought she was the bee’s knees – and unfortunately, she is not the only lesbian I have heard speaking publicly in such a manner! Seriously like, it’s embarrassing! Not only for the girl herself, but on behalf of all lesbians in general – not to mention hypocritical.
How many times have we heard both straight and lesbian women complain about men who speak about women in such an immature/objectifying/degrading manner? How often would the same lesbians (who are today parrot-like repeating such sexist comments) agree with other women about how disgusting it is to hear a bunch of guys speak about a girl in such a way?
So, to what extent is this ‘brag speak’ a backlash against the fact that such girls had to fumingly listen to straight lads bragging about their sexual exploits with women, when they themselves were sexually inexperienced on this score? Was their anger at the sexist objectifying of women by boys really just jealousy in another guise? After all, these girls are now just as bad as any lad that they may have criticised in the past – if not worse, considering they themselves are women.
However, sometimes when I listen to/overhear lesbians who speak in this manner about other women I can’t help but think to myself, ‘she doesn’t actually see herself as a women.’ As confusing as this sounds, I’m not talking about people who identify as Transgender. To be honest, I’m a little confused as to what exactly I mean myself! It’s hard to articulate. But it’s like some gay girls feel almost removed from the fact that they are a woman. After all, how could you speak about another woman in such a way if you yourself identified with the same gender?
Then again, perhaps the reason for such ‘brag speak’ is not as complex as I have imagined. Plain and simply, perhaps the majority of these girls just aren’t getting any. After all, aren’t the people who feel the need to constantly talk about sex, the ones who aren’t actually having sex? I mean, it would literally take seconds to download a picture of a hot topless girl off the Internet (not that I would know anything about such things…ehem…) Who’s to say that what cropped haired girl in my college had on her iPhone wasn’t sourced from the net? But her iPhone beeped I hear you say! Sure who’s to say that wasn’t her Mother or better yet, one of those annoying texts from her phones service provider!
Dare not speak its name
Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that we should be as mute as a monk when it comes to speaking to friends about our sex lives (although some would think so – in particular if they really have feelings/respect the girl in question), but surely there is a time and a place – not to mention a certain way of speaking about it?
Maybe some girls will say “well look this is just the way I speak Kris, I’m not going to change it for anyone (let alone someone I’ve never even met), freedom of expression and all that. It’s liberating!”
Well, alright, fair enough, but at least don’t do it in a college classroom, surrounded by strangers?! Especially just after I’ve had my lunch. Cheers