Being a gay teacher
Tags: gay teachers
Niamh could teach them a thing or two
Monday morning. I have mixed feelings. I’m looking forward to work and I’m slightly dreading it. I can’t wait to see the children again, the smile on their faces when they come into the classroom, I have a cool art lesson planned, and I got new toys over the weekend that I know they’re going to love. I get to school, the morning goes well. We all have fun. I have one of those great moments where you can see progress in a particular child and you know your hard work is paying off. Our nursery rhyme this week is Incy Wincy Spider, they all laugh and clap at my impression of Incy Wincy falling down in the rain, I’m here ’till Friday kids!
That includes the teachers
Bell goes. It’s lunchtime. Staffroom is calling. Now for your typical Monday morning conversation. I have a few scenarios where I employ different techniques to avoid anyone finding out I’m gay.
Scenario Number 1: Be Vague and non-specific
Colleague: “Good morning, how are you?”
Me: “Grand now and yourself?”
Colleague: “Tired after the weekend. It goes too fast”
Me: “Stop!”
Colleague: “What did you do for the weekend?”
The dreaded question.
Me: “Just went for a quiet drink with a friend in town, the usual spots.”
What I really want to say. “Well I went to (insert name of whatever gay club I’ve frequented that weekend) with my best friend and I met her girlfriend for the first time. She’s lovely. We had an unreal time saw loads of people I knew that I hadn’t seen in ages, it was great craic.”
Scenario Number 2: Substitute the word gay or lesbian with ‘alternative’!
Colleague: “Hey, how was your weekend away in London?”
Me: “Brilliant. Had a great time.”
Colleague: “It was a concert you went over for wasn’t it? Who did you see again?”
Me: “Em you probably wouldn’t have ever heard of them. Tegan and Sara?”
Colleague: “No, never heard of them what kind of music is it?”
Me: “Kind of alternative music.”
Colleague: “Oh right.”
In my mind, “please don’t let them Google Tegan and Sara and find out they’re lesbian twins from Canada”.
Scenario Number 3: The barefaced lie
Colleague: “What did you do for the weekend?”
Me: “I just went for dinner with a friend who was visiting me.”
LIE, LIE, LIE. Inside I’m screaming SHE’S MORE THAN JUST A FRIEND. Scenario number three gives me a pain in the pit of my stomach. My parents, my brother, all my friends know I’m gay, but I can’t be honest with my work colleagues. This is one messed up situation.
Am I protected?
The law is vague to me, but I don’t feel protected, as I understand it I could be fired for being gay if someone thinks that my sexuality is affecting the ethos of the school. I’m only a young teacher, I might miss out on a promotion, my contract might not get renewed. My friends who are gay and who are teachers are in the closet in school too. At least we’re in the same boat together.
I love the classroom, I loathe the staffroom. They are listening to me, but I say nothing. They can see me, but I am invisible. They know my name, but they don’t have a clue who I am.
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I think it’s a terrible situation to be in, I feel for the teacher. It’s so unfair not to be able to be who you fully are. It’s so unfair to be under the threat of a possible job loss for being gay. This needs to change.
Totally understand where you are coming from…am a teacher too and its definitely not acceptable to be out…individual teachers may be fine but people get really really weird when they think of gay people teaching their kids. .. this is partly the reason why I have remained in the closet for so long. ..
It’s an unrelenting truth, and one that shouldn’t happen, that no one should go through. Society is changing though, if that’s any consolation. I know it’s not an immediate solution, but hold tight, stay true to you, and it’ll work out well, there’s too many people of younger generations who are completely accepting of all sexualities, tables are turning.
Agree that it is changing… a bit too late for me but better late than never
[...] Being a Gay Teacher: Monday morning. I have mixed feelings. I’m looking forward to work and I’m slightly dreading it. I can’t wait to see the children again, the smile on their faces when they come into the classroom, I have a cool art lesson planned, and I got new toys over the weekend that I know they’re going to love. I get to school, the morning goes well. We all have fun. I have one of those great moments where you can see progress in a particular child and you know your hard work is paying off. Our nursery rhyme this week is Incy Wincy Spider, they all laugh and clap at my impression of Incy Wincy falling down in the rain, I’m here ’till Friday kids! [...]
Can’t believe this is still happening in this day and age. It’s tough enough being a young teacher (trying to get your foot in the door in the first place, wondering will you get another contract for next year, etc.) without knowing that your school can legally fire you for your sexuality.
I was reading today that there are real plans to change the employment law that allows certain religious and medical institutions from dismissing someone due to their sexuality or ethical beliefs….high time…is that equality I see over the horizon?