gaelick » The Sapphic Screen

The Sapphic Screen – Nov 23 to 28

click here — Sat, 22 Nov 2008 22:38:24 +0000

Greetings, Gaelickers! I’m taking over this week’s installment of The Sapphic Screen in HAL’s stead. I hope I can live up to her standards!

And what a week to cover: lesbian invisibility returns to the small screen, with a vengeance. Except, that is, for Angelina Jolie. Fans of the be-lipped wonder can knock themselves out with about 85 million appearances from her throughout the week.

Everyday

The Ellen DeGeneres Show - Check out Her Royal Gayness, King of Queens. TV3 at 2.10pm

Buffy the Vampire Slayer – Is Tara still shuffling around this mortal coil..? Channel 6 at 5.10pm

Will & Grace – The box-set of the complete seasons is €250, see it here for free. Living 7pm and 1am

Hollyoaks Later – This short series, a week-long spin-off of Channel 4 fixture Hollyoaks, develops the storyline of Sarah and Zoe. Apparently, they kiss, and maybe more. And the dirtee hussies are confined to post-watershed hours, where they belong. E4 10pm

23 Sunday

Peil na mBan Beo – It’s women’s GAA – how lesbionic can you get? TG4 at 5.20pm

Divas II – A whole rake of ladies get together for a sing-song, including P!nk, who is definitely not a lesbian. UTV at 8pm

God Bless America – Following Barack Obama’s victory and the defeat of equality for same-sex relationships, this programme looks at the effect of religious conservatism on voter behaviour in the U.S. Channel 4 at 7pm

I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here!- What? There are three homersexualists in it this year – we’re allowed to watch.. TV3 and UTV at 9pm

24 Monday

Nina’s Heavenly Delights – Soppy but sexy story of a young woman who comes home to Scotland to look after the family’s Indian restaurant. Sky Movies Indie at 4:30pm

I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here! – Our celesbian and her two ‘moes continue their adventures in nature – who’ll be kicked out?! TV3 and UTV at 9pm

Katherine Lynch’s Wonderwomen – You either love it or you hate it: the series continues with Dublin’s drag scene’s Lynch and her questionable content. RTÉ2 at 10pm

25 Tuesday

The Black Dahlia – With a cast that includes Mia “L Word” Kirshner, Hilary “Boys Don’t Cry” Swank, Fiona “Ireland’s most fabulous dykon” Shaw; a cameo from k.d. lang, and several 1940s lesbian bar scenes; and director Brian De Palma, whose credits include Dressed To Kill, this is recommended queer viewing. Sky Movies Drama at 3:45pm

High Society’s Favourite Gigolo – The rise and fall of Britain’s first black entertainer, and highest paid entertainer of the 1920s and ’30s, Leslie Hutchinson, is examined in this episode of the High Society series. We’ll see if the programme looks at his relationships with Cole Porter, Ivor Novello and fellow bisexual, Tallulah Bankhead. Channel 4 at 9pm

The Culture Show – Angelina Jolie makes appearance number 1 of the week, talking about her career and new film, A Mighty Heart. BBC2 at 11:20pm

26 Wednesday

I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here! – ITV’s website ranks the gays among the least popular of the contestants – will it prove correct?! TV3 and UTV at 8:30pm

La Ciénaga – This intense family drama where the adolescents play while the adults are away, and described as “Chekov in Argentina”, includes a lesbian-crush sub-plot. I warned you that this week lesbian invisibility is taking over – I’m taking the lesbiality where I can find it! Film4 at 10:55pm

A Queer Try – A repeat of the series following Northern Ireland’s first gay rugby team, the Ulster Titans, from their earliest days as a team to their bid for glory at the Bingham Cup. BBC1 at 11:15pm

27 Thursday

A Culture Show Special: Angelina Jolie – It’s Angie again! This time she’s yakking on about her film career (again) and her other recent film, Changeling. BBC2 at 7pm

I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here! – Is this thing still on..? TV3 and UTV at 9pm

Life or Something Like It – It’s Angie again again! This is a comedy, or something. BBC2 at 11:50pm

28 Friday

Mulholland Dr. – Another weird offering from David Lynch, featuring the muchas appealing Naomi Watts and Laura Elena Harring. Sky Movies Indie at 5:30pm

I’m A Celebrity … Get Me Out of Here! – Oh, good lord, these z-list slebs (except for Martina, of course), are bad enough without subjecting us in TV-land to slatherings of icky creepy-crawlies and guck. Make it end! TV3 and UTV at 9pm

The Late Late Toy Show – There’s nothing particularly gay about this programme, but it’s The Late Late Toy Show! Although it’s never been the same since The Plank wrecked it.. RTÉ1 at 9:35pm

Katherine Lynch’s Wonderwomen – More from the other Lynch and her probably offensive caricatures. RTÉ2 at 11:20pm

The Culture Show Uncut – Oh for goodness sake. Seriously, Angie, there’s such a thing as overkill, hon. BBC2 at 12:05am

No related posts.

The Sapphic Screen – Nov 9 to 14

HAL — Sun, 09 Nov 2008 13:42:35 +0000

This week’s telly starts out with a good few things of interest but, by the end of the week, zip. I suppose, with this week being the anniversary of events in both World Wars, it’s understandable that TV is full of documentaries and films about those tough times. Nothing about the women who flew, fought, nursed or worked to keep things together back home. Did they not earn a mention?

Everyday

The Ellen Degeneres Show - Check out Her Royal Gayness, King of Queens. TV3 at 2.10pm

Buffy the Vampire Slayer- Tara is alive in these episodes, but not for long…Channel 6 at 5.10pm

Will & Grace -The box-set of the complete seasons is €250, see it here for free. Living 7pm and 1am

9 Sunday

A Few Good Men -Ignore Tom Cruise, this is all about the uniforms. Sky Movies Drama at 5.30pm

Alexander – Camp reworking of the story of Alexander the Great. Angelina, as his mother, overplays it but that accent is pretty damn sexy. Colin Farrell as a Macedonian king with blonde haie, black eyebrows and an Irish accent? Hilarious. TV3 at 9pm

Stephen Fry in America- Stephen Fry continues his journey across America by taking a look at the dramatic landscapes and peoples of the South West. He encounters Navajo Indians, learns to weave a basket, stays aboard a luxurious houseboat, and lives out his fantasy of becoming a cowboy at the Old Tucson Studios. BBC at 9pm

The Brave One - Jodie kicks some serious ass as a woman on a mission to make the bad guys pay. Sky Movies Premiere at 10.20pm (most nights this week)

Boys on the Side - Whoopi does her best to show that she’s in love with Mary Louise Parker, while the director keeps a strangle-hold on her character. Entertaining, sisters are doing it for themselves stuff. I defy you not to cry. Film4 at 10.50pm

10 Monday

Fire – Two women in modern-day India fall in love and have to deal with the cultural and emotional fallout. Sky Movies Indie at 4.30pm

Some Kind of Wonderful – Mary Stuart Masterson plays the tomboy of the 80s in this classic teen film. Sky Movies Drama at 6.15pm

Far From Heaven - When ‘perfect’ 50s housewife Cathy (Julianne Moore, left) walks in on her ‘perfect’ 50s husband kissing another man, her world starts to fall apart. She finds solace and friendship with the gardener, and has to deal withe the fact that she may be falling in love with a black man. Powerful stuff, beautifully played by all involved. Essential viewing. Film4 at 9pm

Katherine Lynch’s Wonderwomen – Dubs who’ve been on the gay scene will recognise Katherine Lynch as one half of Lynch and Hamilton, the duo who entertained a few years ago. Here’s hoping she can make it on RTE, but with this truely embarrassingly awful show, methinks not. RTE2 at 10pm

Law & Order: SVU – In a world of uncertainty, you can always rely on Mariska to perk you up . TV3 at 10pm

Storyville; Prodigal Sons – Fascinating documentary about director Kimberely Reed’s reunion with her brother who hasn’t seen her since her gender reassignment surgery. BBC4 at 10pm

The Brave One – Tonight’s showing of Jodie kicking some bootay . Sky Movies Premiere at 10.20pm

Underworld - Over-the-top gothic-lite film in which you get both vampires and werewolves. Check out Kate Beckinsale in that all-leather get up (right)! Channel 4 at 10.35pm

Grey’s Anatomy- It’s getting closer to that kiss. Living at Midnight

South of Nowhere- This is a ridiculous time to screen a tv show for teens. This hit American show tells the story of Ashley and Spencer (above left), two girls who fall in love. RTE2 at 3.15am

11 Tuesday

Anna and the King – Jodie dons a dress and looks after the kids in this remake of The King and I. Don’t worry , there’s no singing. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 5.30pm

How the Irish Have Sex – Continuing the series looking at how Irish people’s views towards sex have change over the years. TV3 at 9pm

The Brave One – See Sunday. Sky Movies Modern Premiere at 10pm

12 Wednesday

Wilde - Gaelick-fave, Stephen Fry, imbues the story of Oscar Wilde’s downfall with a warm all-too-human heart. Sky Movies Modern Greats a10am

The Page Turner - As a gifted child, pianist Melanie has the world at her feet until she losses a competition and just can’t get over it – leaving the piano and her talent behind in a cloud pf bitterness. Year’s later, the judge who voted against her needs an assistant. Thus begins a chilling, sexy exploration of obsession and blame. Sky Movies Indie at 6.30pm

Rachel Allen: Bake! - Gorgeous, posh and delicious, and just the caramelised apples in this week’s serving. RTE1 at 7.30pm

Little Man Tate – Jodie directs. Sky Movies Modern Family at 9.30pm

The Brave One – See Sunday. Sky Movies Modern Premiere at 10.20pm

Boys on the Side - See Sunday. Sky Movies at 12.40am

13 Thursday

Saved! - Teen satire in which best-girl in a Christian school, Mary, falls pregnant trying to ‘save’ her gay boyfriend. RTE2 at 9.35pm

Underdogs - It’s back. Check out how the girls get on trying to make it onto the Underdogs footie team. TG4 at 9.30pm

The Brave One – See Sunday. Sky Movies Modern Premiere at 10.00pm

14 Friday

Blade:Trinity - Silly stuff about vampires and daywalkers. Jessica Biel is uber-sexy (right) and, for those of you who love the boys, Ryan Reynolds removes his shirt….. Film4 at 9pm

Katherine Lynch’s Wonderwomen- Dubs who’ve been on the gay scene will recognise Katherine Lynch as one half of Lynch and Hamilton, the duo who entertained a few years ago. Here’s hoping she can make it on RTE. RTE2 at Midnight

No related posts.

The Sapphic Screen – Nov 3 to 8

HAL — Mon, 03 Nov 2008 08:30:09 +0000

Ladies, our voices have been heard. Yes, Lez the Leprechaun is back in Sky Movies. How do I know? When you see Boys Don’t Cry and Nina’s Heavenly Delights, you know that order has been restored.

Everyday

The Ellen Degeneres Show - Check out Her Royal Gayness, King of Queens. TV3 at 2.10pm

Buffy the Vampire Slayer- Tara is alive in these episodes, but not for long…Channel 6 at 5.10pm

Will & Grace -The box-set of the complete seasons is €250, see it here for free. Living 7pm and 1am

3 Monday

Law & Order SVU - A gay episode!!!!! TV3 at 10pm

Grey’s Anatomy- It’s getting closer to that kiss. Living at Midnight

South of Nowhere- This is a ridiculous time to screen a tv show for teens. This hit American show tells the story of Ashley and Spencer (above left), two girls who fall in love. RTE2 at 3am

4 Tuesday

Coming Out to Class – Openly gay British rapper Marcos ‘QBoy’ Brito investigates the realities of coming out in Britain’s schools. Channel 4 at 10.05am

Dreamgirls – So bad it’s…well awful, but before Corky in Bound, Gina Gershon played a lesbian in this camp as knickers film (right). Sky Movies Modern Greats at 2.05pm

How the Irish Have Sex – Continuing the series looking at how Irish people’s views towards sex have change over the years. TV3 at 9pm

Mr and Mrs Smith – Switch off the sound and enjoy. E4 at 9pm

5 Wednesday

Batty Man - Follow comedian and actor Stephen K Amos as he explores why homophobia is so prevalent in the black community. He travels to Jamaica to meet people living in fear for their lives for being gay. Channel 4 at 10.05am

Rachel Allen: Bake! - Gorgeous Rachel Allen cooks up some yumminess. Pity she’s so posh, they’re cupcakes love, not ‘capcakes’. RTE1 at 7.30pm

Fire - Excellent film about two Indian women who risk everything to enjoy the love that dare not speak its name. Sky Movies Indie at 8pm

Boys Don’t Cry- Hilary Swank is superb in this devastatingly moving film about trans-guy Brandon Teena. Sky Movies Indie at 10pm

Rick and Steve: The Happiest Gay Couple in All the World - Although America’s gay sweethearts (Rick & Steve) and America’s lesbian sweethearts (Kirsten & Dana) do not get along at all, they decide to have a baby together. Steve is jealous that the lesbians prefer Rick’s sperm, so he comes up with an alternate plan – with the help of Pussy the cat. Synopsis from imdb.com. E4 at 10.30pm

The L Word - Shane and Carmen (left….sluuurp) get ready to tie the knot. Channel 6 at Midnight

Laramie Inside Out - Filmmaker Beverly Seckinger, who grew up in Laramie, was compelled to return to her hometown to see how the murder of Matthew Shepard had altered the site of her own closeted adolescence. RTE1 at 1am

6 Thursday

Underdogs - It’s back. Check out how the girls get on trying to make it onto the Underdogs footie team. TG4 at 9.30pm

Aeon Flux- Ridiculous sci-fi shenanigans, but check out Charlize (right)….drool. RTE2 at 9.30pm

7 Friday

In and Out - According to this silly film, the only thing you need to know to be gay are the complete works of Barbra Streisand. I’m straight so. Film4 at 9pm

Nina’s Heavenly Delights - Soppy but sexy story of a young woman who comes home to Scotland to look after the family’s Indian restaurant. Sky Movies Indie at 3.20am

8 Saturday

Wilde - Tender biopic of author and acclaimed wit Oscar Wilde, focusing on his affair with Lord Alfred Douglas at a time when homosexual liaisons were illegal. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 7.30am#

Maverick- Jodie does blonde-giggly girl schtick. Cringe. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 11.50amand 5.50pm

No related posts.

The Sapphic Screen – Oct 19 to 24

HAL — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 08:42:58 +0000

More paltry pickings on the gogglebox this week. There’s the usual yummy Willow/Tara goodness everyday on Channel 6 and a few movies, but the days are getting darker by the looks of it. Is it too much to ask that, will all of those extra stations Sky Movies have, they put on a few lesbalicious flicks? Grumble, grumble….

Everyday

The Ellen Degeneres Show - Check out Her Royal Gayness, Ellen. TV3 at 2.10pm

Buffy the Vampire Slayer- Tara is alive in these episodes. Good times! Channel 6 at 5.10pm

Will & Grace -The box-set of the complete seasons is €250, see it here for free. Living 7pm and 1am

19 Sunday
The Graham Norton Show – Including an interview with Sandy Toksvig (right), a comedian who was out and proud years before it was cool. It is cool right? BBC2 at 11pm

The Good Shepherd - Matt Damon trudges around the world in a trench coat that’s too big for him, while setting up the CIA. Angie’s looking good though. Sky Movies Drama at 5pm

Stephen Fry in America - Our hero journeys across America in the first of a six-part series, meeting all manner of colourful characters along the way. BBC1 at 9pm

20 Monday

Law & Order SVU- Olivia and her quirked eyebrow save the day. Here’s hoping her hair is better than last week’s disaster. TV3 at 10pm

21 Tuesday

Dreamgirls – So bad it’s…well awful, but before Corky in Bound, Gina Gershon played a lesbian in this camp as knickers film. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 2.05pm

The Rocky Horror Picture Show - Let’s do the time warp agaaaain. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 8pm

How the Irish Have Sex – Continuing the series looking at how Irish people’s views towards sex have change over the years. TV3 at 9pm

Brokeback Mountain – He…sniff..hugs the shirt….waaaaaaahhhhhhh. Film4 at 9pm

Notes on a Scandal - Judi Dench is terrifying as an older woman obsessed with a fellow teacher. Sky Movies Drama at 10pm

The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas - It may be Dolly Parton’s show, but in the background look out for Fanny Flagg, author of Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistlestop Cafe. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 11.55pm

Imagine….A Love Story- Looking at what makes a good love story, with contribution with the one and only Sarah Waters (left). BBC1 at 11.35pm

22 Wednesday

Rachel Allen: Bake! - Gorgeous Rachel Allen cooks up some yumminess. Pity she’s so posh, they’re cupcakes love, not ‘capcakes’. RTE1 at 7.30pm

The L Word - Avoid this episode if you love Dana. Channel 6 at Midnight

23 Thursday

Cashmere Mafia - Caitlin is falling fast, but her budding lesbian relationship is outed on the Internet. RTE2 at 11.35

Underdogs - It’s back. Check out how the girls get on trying to make it onto the Underdogs footie team. TG4 at 9.30pm

Offside - Iran’s soccer fans are predominately male, but one girl (above) is determined to be accepted and enjoy her love for the beautiful game. Sky Movies Indie at 10pm

24 Friday

The Page Turner – As a young girl, piano prodigy, Mélanie, losses a competition by one vote. As an adult, she has the chance to meet and affect the life of the judge who, she feels, ruined her. An intense relationship ensues. Sky Movies Indie at 6.25pm

No related posts.

The Sapphic Screen – Oct 12 to 18

HAL — Sat, 11 Oct 2008 15:29:11 +0000

It’s a pretty bad week in the land of lesbian TV. The update on Leslie the Leprachaun in Sky is that she seems to be sick but is doing her best to work from home. It seems that way as there are a few films for us, but not as many as she has been spoiling us with over the past few weeks. We didn’t take you for granted Lez, we appreciate you and love you. Come back, please!

Everyday

The Ellen Degeneres Show - Check out Her Royal Gayness, Ellen. TV3 at 2.10pm

Buffy the Vampire Slayer- Tara is alive in these episodes. Good times! Channel 6 at 5.10pm

Will & Grace -The box-set of the complete seasons is €250, see it here for free. Living 7pm and 1am

12 Sunday
For One Night Only - Pink performs! UTV at 7pm

Hairspray - Camp, upbeat and guaranteed to have you singing along….Good Morning Baaaaaltimore….. Sky Movies Premiere at 9pm

Stephen Fry in America - Our hero journeys across America in the first of a six-part series, meeting all manner of colourful characters along the way.BBC1 at 9pm

Victor/Victoria – The original woman playing a man playing a woman film. Gender-bending goodness. TCM at 11.15pm

Law & Order: SVU - Your first helping of Olivia Benson for the week. Sluuuurp. Channel 6 at 10.25pm

Would You Believe? - The story of 47-year-old Patrick Lynch, who was forced to suppress his sexuality for 30 years due to his religious beliefs. RTE1 at 10.35pm

It’s My Life - Gay priests and female bishops are in the spotlight. UTV at 12.15am

The L Word - More re-runs to keep us happy until the new and final season starts at the end of January. Living at 3am

13 Monday

Nina’s Heavenly Delights (right)- Silly, sentimental film about a young woman coming home to help out in her parent’s Indian restaurant and falling in love in the process. Hot lesbian with Scottish accent….yes please. Sky Movies Indie at 4.40pm

Law & Order SVU- Olivia saves the day in the world’s sexiest jacket. TV3 at 10pm

14 Tuesday

How the Irish Have Sex – Continuing the series looking at how Irish people’s views towards sex have change over the years. TV3 at 9pm

15 Wednesday

Rachel Allen: Bake! - The delicious Rachel Allen (left) shows us her cupcakes. RTE1 at 7.30pm

Spotlight: Pride or Prejudice - Journalist Barry Hollywood investigates the impact of of Iris Robinson’s anti-gay statements and asks if it is good to be gay in Northern Ireland. BBC 2 at 10pm

The L Word - Max (right) is becoming aggressive. People fail to care. Channel 6 at 11.35pm

16 Thursday

Nina’s Heavenly Delights (again)- Silly, sentimental film about a young woman coming home to help out in her parent’s Indian restaurant and falling in love in the process. Hot lesbian with Scottish accent….yes please Sky Movies Indie at 1.10pm

The Fabulous Baker Boys - Michelle Pfeiffer. In that dress. On a piano. Hot! TCM at 9pm

17 Friday

Mum’s Gone Gay - Dramatising the impact on families with teenage children when a parent comes out, it focuses on one family as they react to the news of their mother’s homosexuality, the narrative unfolds over the course of two weeks. Channel 4 at 9.55am

Fire. Earth. Water – Three films by Deepa Mehta exploring the taboos surrounding women in India. the first, Fire, explores lesbian love, while Earth studies class issues and Water looks at where widows sit in Indian society. Sky Movies Indie from 12.40pm

Little Man Tate - Jodie directs. Sky Movies Family at 4.30pm

Serial Mom - Kathleen Turner has a ball as a picture-perfect, middle-class mother, who happens to be a serial killer. Channel 6 at 10pm

No related posts.

The Sapphic Screen – Oct 5 to 12

HAL — Sun, 05 Oct 2008 12:10:23 +0000

Ladies I feel I must apologise. It seems I have gotten someone fired from their job. Yes, the day has come when the lesbian leprechaun in Sky Movies is no more. Now I don’t know if she has actually received her P45, but the evidence is clear: there are no lesbian films on any of the Sky Movies channels this week. Could she be on holiday? I pray to Xena that it be true.
To make amends, I have added to the TV guide, to you can see what’s on/moan about the lack of lesbians on TV 6 days a week.

Everyday

GaytoZ - Follow the lives of a group of young people living life as colours of the rainbow. Channel 4 at 9.30am

The Ellen Degeneres Show - Check out Her Royal Gayness, Ellen. TV3 at 2.10pm

Buffy the Vampire Slayer- Tara is alive in these episodes. Good times! Channel 6 at 5.10pm

Will & Grace -The box-set of the complete seasons is €250, see it here for free. Living 7pm and 1am

5 Sunday
Living with…Boy George - The wonderfully entertaining and gender-bending Boy George let’s us follow him around while he meets up with mates and goes to visit his mammy in Ireland. Living at 8pm

Law & Order: SVU - Your first helping of Olivia Benson for the week. Sluuuurp. Channel 6 at 10.30pm

Chasing Angelina - No, not a video diary of my average Saturday, but a fly-on-the-wall documentary of the paparazzi and the lengths they’ll go to to get an exclusive. TV3 at 11.15pm

6 Monday

Wilde - Excellent re-telling of the trial and downfall of Oscar Wilde. Jude Law plays Bosie and the fabulous Stephen Fry is the Wilde man. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 4pm

Bring It On- Formulaic pic about a cheerleading team striving to be the best. What drags it into the ‘must see’ category is Eliza Dushku. With that entrance she stole many lesbian hearts. FILM4 at 9pm

Law & Order SVU- Olivia saves the day in the world’s sexiest jacket. TV3 at 10pm

7 Tuesday

How the Irish Have Sex – With taaay and bickies. Ok, maybe not. This series explores how far our wee Catholic nation has come in terms of our attitudes towards sex. Sounds like it’ll be a short series. TV3 at 9pm

My Generation – Our Anna Nolan (right) visits her old school in Stanthorpe Street and talks to kids from Terenure College to see the similariities and differences between teenagers in Ireland. RTE1 at 10.35pm

8 Wednesday

Notes On a Scandal - Judi Dench is one of the most terrifying people put on celluloid, in this adaptation of the novel. She is a sexually repressed woman obsessed with fellow teacher, Cate Blanchett. Sky Movies Drama at 6.15pm

The L Word - Who is more annoying, Jenny or Max? Watch tonight’s episode and see. Channel 6 at 11.35pm

9 Thursday

Cashmere Mafia -The fight to be the next Sex and the City continues with this show about four female friends who are impossibly fashionable and living in Manhattan. In this one though, one of our ladies (left) falls for a member of the fairer sex. Enjoy it while it lasts. RTE2 at 12.05am

Little Man Tate - Jodie directs. Sky Movies Family at 9.30pm

10 Friday

Wire In the Blood -From The Defeated (Part 1 of 2). When a young gay murder victim is linked to the killing of a second young man, Tony is called in to investigate the bizarre chain of murders. UTV at 10pm

No related posts.

The Sapphic Screen – Sept 29 to Oct 3

HAL — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 20:04:46 +0000

Lots of delicious helpings of Mariska as Olivia Benson in Law & Order SVU this week, and the lesbian leprechaun in Sky Movies is still ensuring we get some fabulous faggy fare. I have to find out who she is and buy her a drink or two.

Everyday

Will & Grace -Still making us laugh 10 years later, still should be called Jack & Karen. Living 7pm and 1am

29 Monday

Anna and the King - Jodie manages to hold her own in a fairly bad remake of the King and I, sans singing. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 11.15am

Little Man Tate – More Jodie. Sky Movies Family at 1.15pm

Grey’s Anatomy - It’s season 4, so get setting your timer, this is the one that ends with the hottest lesbian kiss in many a year (right). Living at 3pm

Law and Order SVU – Dial M for Mariska , hubba hubba. TV3 at 10pm

30 Tuesday

Wilde - Excellent telling of the trial and downfall of Oscar Wilde. Jude Law plays Bosie and the fabulous Stephen Fry is the Wilde man. Sky Movies Modern Greats at 6pm

Nina’s Heavenly Delights - Feel-good rom-com about a (gorgeous) Scottish woman coming to terms with her Indian heritage, and picking a girlfriend up on the way. Sky Movies Indie at 6.40pm

Law and Order SVU – Just in case you can’t get enough of Mariska. Five at 11pm

GAA - If you missed the fantastic women’s football final on Saturday, now’s your chance to catch up. TG4at 12.25am

Boys Don’t Cry - If you haven’t seen this heart-breaking account of the last days of Brandon Teena, here’s your chance before they take your queer-card back. Hilary Swank is charmingly charismatic as Brandon. Sky Movies Drama at 12 midnight.. Sky Movies Drama at 11.45pm

1 Wednesday

Living with…Boy George - The wonderfully entertaining and gender-bending Boy George let’s us follow him around while he meets up with mates and goes to visit his mammy in Ireland. Living at 10pm

The L Word - Tina continues to explore men. Bleugh… Channel 6 at 11.30pm

2 Thursday

Flashdance - Check out Bette, I mean Jennifer Beals (right), as a sexy as hell welder (yes I said welder) who just wants to dance. Follow your dream Bette! Sky Movies Modern Greats at 110.40am

The Truth About Cats and Dogs - Silly modern remake of Cyrano de Bergerac in which always-watchable Janeane Garofalo falls for Ben Chaplin but he has the hots for Uma Thurman. Watch it with mates and rewrite it in your head – you just know Janeane and Uma would hit it off if the English bloke would leave them to it. Sky Movies Comedy at 11.20am

Some Like It Hot - Almost perfect, comedy with Marylin Monroe. She’s fab but it’s Jack Lemmon who steals the show as one of a couple of musician hiding from the mob as a woman. Best last line in a movie – ever. Sky Movies Classics at 1.30pm

3 Friday

The World’s Richest Women in Entertainment -You can be guaranteed that canny-with-her-millions Ellen will be in here somewhere. TV3 at 10pm

Law & Order SVU - Look who it is; hey there Mariska (left). Five at 10pm

The Haunting - Unscary remake of a classic 1963 horror. The wonderful Lily Taylor is in it though and she plays the role which was originally a lesbian but who’s sexuality was cloaked it was kind of hard to tell. Sky Movies Horror at 3.20pm

No related posts.

Small Sapphic screen – Sept 22 to 25

HAL — Sat, 13 Sep 2008 15:25:51 +0000

This week it’s all about gorgeous women in cop shows, and a couple of movies to spice things up. I think there is a lesbian working in Sky, every couple of weeks she makes sure that Boys Don’t Cry is on, as well as more Angelina than any woman can handle. It’d be nice trying though.

Everyday

Will & Grace -Still making us laugh 10 years later, still should be called Jack & Karen. Living 7pm and 1am

22Monday

Law and Order SVU – Nothing too gay here but look at Mariska (left) – holy gorgeous butch Batman! TV3 at 10pm

The Good Shepherd – Slow-moving, heavy-handed tale of the beginning of the CIA in America. Matt Damon is badly miscast in the main role but the sapphic interest here is Miss Angelina. Yumm! She’s not in it enough, but when she is radiates. As usual. Sky Movie Drama at 5.10pm Sky Movies Drama at 8pm

Mr & Mrs Smith – Brad who? Film4 at 9pm

Boys Don’t Cry – If you haven’t seen this heart-breaking account of the last days of Brandon Teena, here’s your chance before they take your queer-card back. Hilary Swank is charmingly charismatic as Brandon. Sky Movies Drama at 10.45pm

23Tuesday

Nigella Express- Food porn as Nigella Lawson (right) shows us how to entertain. The minx. BBC2 at 7pm.

Maverick - Jodie does comedy. Cringe. Sky Movie Comedy at 10.40am and 5.50pm

The Hunger - Susan Sarandon and Catherine Deneuve getting it on? Hell yeah! The Hunger has dated true enough, but it’s a classic. TCM at 9pm

24Wednesday

The L Word - Jenny meets the only other person in the world who thinks she can write; a publisher played by Sandra Bernhard. Channel 6 at 11.35pm

25Thursday

The Virgin Daughters - Documentary examining the phenomenon of young American women who pledge to stay virgins until they’re married. Some even refuse to kiss until wed. Sounds like they’re all lesbians to me! Film4 at 9pm

She’s the Man – Recent teen movie which has a young queer cult-following. The always-charming Amanda Bynes plays Viola, a girl who dresses as a guy and then falls in love with some poor, unsuspecting bloke. Not highly intelligent but enjoyably gender-bending stuff.Sky Movies Family at 8pm

26Friday

A Few Good Men- It’s all about the uniforms. Jodie was supposed to play the role which was eventually filled by Demi Moore; travesty.Sky Movies Drama at 5.40pm

Cruel Intentions - The film in which Sarah Michelle Gellar kisses Selma Blair – nothing else going for it really. Sky Movies Drama at 10pm

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Small Sapphic screen – Sept 1 to 5

HAL — Sun, 31 Aug 2008 14:27:15 +0000

Monday to Friday, September 1 to 5

This week’s combing through the TV listings sees a few gems pop up. As usual we’re spoilt for choice with women from all colours of the rainbow on the box. Oh I kill me! As usual, if I’ve missed something please let me know.

Monday

Legends: A profile of jazz singer Ella Fitzgerald. Ok she’s not gay, but who hasn’t had Ella on when getting comfy with their lady love? BBC2 at 7pm.

The Accused: Oscar-winning performance from the one and only Jodie in a moving true story about a woman let down by the courts after being raped in a bar. Film4 at 10.55pm

Blade: Telly series ‘inspired’ by the films about the Daywalker – a vampire who can face the sun. There is much lesbian tom-foolery, which is probably the only thing the series had going for it – it bombed in the states. TV3 at 1.35am

Tuesday

The Truth About Cats and Dogs: Silly modern remake of Cyrano de Bergerac in which always-watchable Janeane Garofalo falls for Ben Chaplin but he has the hots for Uma Thurman. Watch it with mates and rewrite it in your head – you just know Janeane and Uma would be better off if the English bloke would leave them to it. Sky Movie Comedy at 3.15pm and 10pm

A Few Good Men: Forget about the men and do your best to ignore Gilette-Ad Tom Cruise, this is all about Demi Moore in that uniform. Sky Movies Drama at 8pm

GAA Beo: Highlights of the Ladies’ Football championships quarter-finals. If you missed the matches on Saturday, set your timer and catch up. TG4 at 12.55am.

Wednesday

Wilde: Excellent telling of the trial and downfall of Oscar Wilde. Jude Law plays Bosie and the fabulous Stephen Fry is the Wilde man. Sky Movie Modern Greats at 3.30pm

She’s the Man: Recent teen movie which has a young queer cult-following. The always-charming Amanda Bynes plays Viola, a girl who dresses as a guy and then falls in love with some poor, unsuspecting bloke. Not hugely intellegent but enjoyably gender-bending stuff. Sky Movie Family at 8pm

Lost in Austen: This sounds like it could be fun. Amanda (played by the lesbian in Hex, Jemima Roper) switches places with Jane Austen’s character Elizabeth Bennett. UTV at 9pm

Blade Trinity: Silly vampire slaying stuff, but check out Jessica Biel – fwwwaaar! Film4 at 9pm

The 11-Year Old Beauty Queen: If you need to re-ignite your feminist flame, watch this documentary about Sasha Bennington who is brain-washed by her parents into thinking that looks and money are all in life. They let these people be parents while we can’t? Grrrrr…..TV3 at 10pm

The Perfect Vagina: I didn’t think there was a imperfect one, but apparently there are women in the UK undergoing cosmetic surgery on their most private parts. Channel 4 at 11pm

The L Word: Season 3 re-showing of the show we love to bitch about, while completely hooked. Channel 6 at 11.25pm

Thursday

Johnny Guitar: Iconic Joan Crawford flick (the one where she wears that cowboy outfit). Sky Movies Classics at 10.50am

Black Narcissus: Excellent oldie about a group of nuns setting up a school in the Himalayas. Sexual repression starts to tear the community apart but the implacable Sister Clodagh (Deborah Kerr and her awful Irish accent) try to keep things together. Channel 4 at 1.30pm

The Accused: Oscar-winning performance from the one and only Jodie in a moving true story about a woman let down by the courts after being raped in a bar. Film4 at 1.50am

Friday

Fire: are two women living in modern India. Living in arranged marriages, they have nothing in common with their husbands and eventually look to one another for love and comapssion. Film that was banned in India for its depiction of lesbianism. Sky Movies Indie at 10.40am

A Queer Try: A new series following the Ulster Titans – Northern Ireland’s gay rugby team. Fab! BBC1 at 9.30pm.

The Good Shepherd: Slow-moving, heavy-handed tale of the beginning of the CIA in America. Matt Damon is badly miscast in the main role but the sapphic interest here is Miss Angelina. Yumm! She’s not in it enough, but when she is radiates. As usual. Sky Movie Drama at 5pm

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Small sapphic screen – Aug 25 to 29

HAL — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 11:19:04 +0000

Monday to Friday, August 25 to 29

I have combed through the TV listings to seek out anything which may help you get through the working week. Pickings are slim, but don’t blame the messenger! If I’ve missed something please let me know.

Monday

The Rose of Tralee: Don’t roll your eyes at me missy! This is serious Irish culture with lovely girls who really want to change the world with their beauty and ability to jig and reel. Seriously good craic if you get the your mates round, get them to buy a Rose each and the winner gets the proceeds. Alcohol required. Concludes on Tuesday. RTE 1 at 8pm

Practical Magic: Pants film about a family of witches, but Dianne Wiest is always worth watching. UTV at 11.30pm

Boys Don’t Cry: If you haven’t seen this heart-breaking account of the last days of Brandon Teena, here’s your chance before they take your queer-card back. Hilary Swank is charmingly charasmatic as Brandon. Sky Movies Drama at 12 midnight.

Tuesday

International Velvet: Star-studded remake of the Elizabeth Taylor classic, this is one of those movies lesbians realise we all loved as kids. Horses, jodhpurs and strong teenager girls – dunno why we loved it. RTE2 at 9am

GAA Beo: Highlights of the Ladies’ Football championships quarter-finals. If you missed the matches on Saturday, set your timer and catch up. TG4 at 1am.

Wednesday

Maverick: Fun-filled cowboy comedy with a fluffy and slightly embarrassing performance by Jodie Foster. Sky Movies Comedy at 1.55pm

Nina’s Heavenly Delights: Feel-good comedy about a (gorgeous) Scottsh woman coming to terms with her Indian heritage, and picking a girlfriend up on the way. Sky Movies Indie at 6.40pm

Gone in 60 Second: Look who it is! Angelina, what a co-incidence…what are you doing here? Looking sexy as all hell as she smoulders as she drives cars nearly as sexy as she is. Put the popcorn on. RET1 9.35pm

Transamerica: Wonderful, warm, inciteful little indie fave, with Felicity Hoffman perfect as a trans woman on a road trip in America. One not to be missed. Film4 at 9pm.

The L Word: Season 3 re-showing of the show we love to bitch about, while completely hooked. Channel 6 at 11.30pm

Amelie: Lesbian favourite, of not for the fairytale plot, then the soundtrack. RTE2 at 1.05am

Thursday

A Girl Thing: Film starring more fantastic actresses than is usually allowed in Hollywood. The wonderful goddess that is Stockard Channing plays a therapist who we watch interact with her patients, two of whom are a lesbian couple played by Kate Capshaw and Elle McPherson. TV3 at 12.10am

Friday

Nothing. Seriously, I scoured the paper and zilch. Go out with your mates, visit your granny, do the ironing – just don’t bother with the TV

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